John McCain has been adorned with more nicknames than a veteran big league ballplayer: McBush, McLame, and on and on.  I want to add one to the list: Lurch.  No, not that giant breathing cadaver that worked as The Addams Family’s butler.  Lurch is the constant state McCain has been in for the past couple of months. Let me give you some examples of how McCain has been lurching from one position to another:

• Smart money had McCain selecting a politically moderate running mate, a Tom Ridge, a Joe Lieberman. But who does Lurch pick?  Attila the Hun with steel rims and a beehive doo.
• During the financial meltdown, McCain announced he was suspending his campaign and not participating in the first debate.  Well, Lurch resumed stumping well before the bailout measure was passed and there he was at his podium in Oxford, Mississippi, looking all weary-eyed and saggy-tailed.
• A week ago the McCain forces were insinuating that Barack Obama was not Christian enough, not patriotic enough and a pal with terrorists.  After enough criticism emerged for inciting the angry, violent-minded mobs at his gatherings, Lurch then described Obama as a decent family man.
• On Saturday, McCain’s people leaked word to Politico that he would be unveiling a detailed proposal on Monday for how America can survive and deal with the current financial meltdown.  On Sunday night, Lurch realized his homework wasn’t going to be ready in time for class Monday morning, so yet another about face.  Now, no proposal is coming.